Being Human
by Hakkari
Summary: GLaDOS brings Chell back to the facility with a special task in mind; to teach Orange and Blue how to act more human. Potential ATLASxP-Body and Chell/GLaDOS friendship. R&R.


"I need your help. Look, I can understand that you're a bit - well, okay, _a lot _- wary of my coming to you after I promised you freedom, but you have to hear me out." The human sighed, twitching her fingers slightly as two robotic arms stretched down and untied her arms. She kept a wary eye on GLaDOS as she stretched herself, sorting out the kink in her back as she reflected on the day's events.

She had gotten up, prepared herself a bowl of oatmeal, blacked out, then found herself back at Aperture with the AI she never wanted to see again staring at her. Okay, so it wasn't much to reflect on, but she was confused as all get out. GLaDOS had said herself that she never wanted to see her again, so why would she abduct her? She wasn't even sure what 'help' she could give the AI that claimed that she knew everything about anything, including what happened after one died (though she _might _have been bluffing about that one; Chell wasn't willing to take the chance, though). After she was done stretching, she stared back up at GLaDOS, meeting the single yellow eye with her hard gray ones. Her arms were crossed over her chest and her weight was shifted to one side; she wasn't screwing around, this time.

"I know I said I'd let you go, and believe me, I don't want you here. Unfortunately, I'm all out of options. I'll give you back your freedom - which I gave so kindly to you after you murdered me - after you help me out. I saved your life, you might as well give a little something back to me in return." A heavy sigh escaped Chell, and she relaxed her posture, dropping her arms to her sides. The yellow eye seemed to almost brighten at her acceptance, her core lifting up a little higher in triumph.

A lift rose up behind Chell, opening and inviting her in. She stared at it for a second before turning back to GLaDOS, eyebrow twitching slightly. "It won't take you to a test." The AI seemed to sense her skepticism, "Have I lied to you yet? I mean since you've arrived here again?" She was staring to show signs of desperation, the human realized. Her blank expression turned into a smirk as she realized that the tables had turned. If she was so desperate, perhaps things could be done more on _Chell's_ terms than than her own.

She stepped into the lift, watching as the AI visibly relaxed. She was still obviously paranoid that the human would murder her, even without a portal gun. It would serve her right, in Chell's mind. She had finally achieved what she had desired, and then old ghosts had to come and take it away from her again. It was infuriating, how much Aperture Science influenced her life. Even when she thought she was rid of the facility - with the exception of her beloved Companion Cube, of course - it had come crashing into the back of her head, knocking her down in a literal sense.

The human still wasn't sure how GLaDOS had managed to kidnap her, unless the Companion Cube really could talk and threaten - well, more than threaten, obviously - to stab her. Or if it had somehow grown arms and legs with which to beat her down with. Both seemed incredibly unlikely, as the Cube was nowhere near her when she had awoken, but it _was_ Aperture and it _was_ GLaDOS. It would be just like her to reprogram the Cube to murder Chell in her sleep, if only for one last laugh at her former test subject's plight.

The lift seemed to be in no hurry to take her anywhere, allowing her a look at the reconstructed facility. It did look better than before, she admitted to herself grudgingly. Pristine white and black panels surrounded the lift, shifting themselves into screens displaying diagrams of some of Aperture Science's technology. Turrets, Hard Light Bridges, Thermal Discouragement Beams... even the portal gun was displayed, though its diagrams flashed by quicker than the others, as if paranoid that Black Mesa would manage to infiltrate the Enrichment Center and get past GLaDOS alive. The human highly doubted it.

Finally it came to a stop, opening its doors and allowing Chell a view of a massive room surrounded by endless pits. A large screen overhead displayed pictures of two robots; one that looked like a personality core outlined in blue and another that looked like a turret outlined in orange. The panels displaying the images were in constant movement, numbers next to the pictures changing at an almost impossible rate.

"Orange, Blue, due to the fact that you have a very special guest waiting for you, I'm afraid I'll have the return you to the Hub by _other_ means." Chell heard an explosion over the intercom and she jumped, confusion settling on her face. Behind her and the lift two soft thunks could be heard, followed by the rapid clicking of footsteps. She turned, and whatever paranoia had been on her face melted away at the sight of the two robots approaching her. They were chirping happily, the orange turret-like bot dancing about the blue core-like one, which only giggled in response to his partner's movements.

They stopped when they saw Chell, and she could have sworn that their optics widened in shock. If the two had jaws, she decided, they would be on the ground. The orange one - Chell was pretty sure that this was the 'Orange' that GLaDOS had been referring to, unless the AI meant to make her look like an idiot - was the first to make any movement towards her, waving her arm awkwardly. Chell smiled, waving back, causing the bot to chirp excitedly, turning back to her partner and gripping his hands with her own. He gurgled his own response, still looking unsure at the human's presence.

The three of them took to staring awkwardly at each other, Orange only quietly trilling to Blue, apparently trying to get him to trust Chell, if their movements were anything to judge by. "Obviously leaving you three together in a room to introduce yourselves was a horrible idea, so I'll take the silence as a prompt to do it myself. Orange, Blue, this is Dangerous Mute Lunatic," Chell looked around the room, settling her eyes on one of GLaDOS's cameras and scowling, "but for brevity's sake, we'll just call her Test Subject or Human. Not that she's either of those anymore. And by that, Lunatic, I mean that you're a _monster_. I wasn't sure if you understood that, so I apologize for using subtlety that you obviously cannot understand."

Chell ignored her, waiting for the AI to continue. GLaDOS didn't disappoint. "You're probably wondering why Test Subject is here with us, when you both saw her being set free. In fact, she's probably wondering the same thing. So, Test Subject, remember that favor I wanted?" Chell nodded enthusiastically, happy that her task was being given to her so quickly.

"The reasons for this aren't important to you, so don't ask questions. Not that you could, being a mute orphan. See the two bots in front of you? I need you to teach them how to be human."

**A/N: No, no one's going to be shoved into a human body. And also, this isn't going to evolve beyond GLaDOS/Chell friendship, so most like no romance unless it's between ATLAS and P-Body (and even that's a little doubtful, at this point).**

**I found time for fanfiction between writing my novel, so here I go. This probably won't be long (keyword being probably), but it will also be rather slice-of-life. If that bothers you, you should probably stop reading now.**

**Anyway, collaboration points for anyone who reviews! I'm aware I already used that one, but since it's actually staring the bots this time, I figured I'd use it again xP**


End file.
